All aboard the marriage bandwagon- “Gays Who Don’t Want Gay Marriage” By Natalie Neusch


I am a heterosexual woman, but have a fair amount of friends that identify as homosexual, one of them happens to be my roommate, my neighbor who has been with me my entire life, he actually helped name me, just broke up with his partner of 4 years, and a co-worker just presented his husband with an engagement ring for Christmas.  Anyway, out of the five people who I am currently thinking of, four of them have been in relationships for more than a year, and have discussed with either me, social media, or friends (or all of the above) about getting married to their partners.

For class, we have read Natalie Neusch’s Gays Who Don’t Want Gay Marriage.  In her article she explains her stance on gay marriage.  Neusch tells readers that she is not on the bandwagon of gay marriage.  She cites other relationships that she has experienced as the reason for this “Growing up in a society where most of the marriages around me failed bitterly or were one of multiple (because the only thing better than one “special day” is five), I’m turned off by the whole idea”.  The author writes that she’s not the only one in the gay community that has not jumped on the bandwagon of gay marriage, Neusch uses Meredith Cummings as an example “The religious implications of marriage are one of the deterring issues for Meredith Cummings, a graduate student in environmental studies who has been in a domestic partnership for two years. “It really gets to me when gay couples try to have a traditional wedding, especially in a religion that doesn’t support homosexuality,” she says”.  She tells us that gay people being able to get married does not feel like progress to her.  I feel that Neusch has the right to not want to get married, just as straight people do not always want to get married, even though they have all the rights to be able to.  Neusch clearly tells readers that it is not that she does not think that people who identify as gay should not get married, “… I hope that all couples, regardless of gender, have the option to marry if they truly wish”.  In the following sentence, she clarifies that being married is not the “number one” thing on her current agenda.  Although I feel that everyone, no matter who you love, has the right to choose to be married, or to forgo the whole situation.  I wonder though how people who read this article with the mindset of marriage equality not being a basic human right, would take Neusch’s writing.  I fear these individuals would use this article as ammunition against marriage equality.



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